Tuesday Song

by Color Theory

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1.
Outside Girl 04:52
I never thought that I'd see you again Not after the things that we said back then I needed you like a wish needs a star But none of that matters now Here you are You say that I really was good for you That no one else really rings true for you I tell you it just wasn't meant to be You capture my hand and say "Why can't we make believe? Start again, everything new" But I won't see it through It could take a week to remember Why it never worked for us before We all stay the same on the inside Though I wish the outside girl was mine Let's not waste our time A part of me wants to make love right now To forget all these things that I said somehow But my mind and my body don't separate I could donate my heart but it wouldn't take My mistake Lust fulfilled can't create love It's just not pure enough You were once the spirit in my soul Now you're just a ghost from long ago But I've grown up I don't believe in ghosts I can't see you.
2.
I saw her in the evening September spoke in red The light was so deceiving I must have lost my head She turned around A teardrop in her eye Her trembling lip As crimson as the sky tonight But oh how my heart bled Awake all night in bed In her arms I prayed The sun would be delayed And back when I was dead If someone would have said That I could feel so free I wouldn't have believed it Her kiss was so romantic Shapeless in the dark I didn't take advantage Of any stray remark I left her there Not even a goodbye Who's crying now Under the glowing autumn sky tonight Believe it.
3.
If you should turn around You'll see me waiting for some kind of sign All of the stupid things my friends say Argue with fear in the back of my mind "What have you got to lose?" "How does it hurt to try?" "What's the worst thing that she can say?" I don't know Maybe I'll wait a day Maybe I've given up long ago I could write you a poem but keep it locked away I could practice for hours words I'll never say If your eyes sent a message like a telegram I would still doubt my senses That's just who I am Baby that's just who I am I guess I'm hoping that Out of the blue or on Valentine's Day You will walk right up and take my hand Say I am yours and then drag me away What have you got to lose? Maybe I'm worth a try Don't we all have our weaknesses? I know mine Maybe they fit with yours Maybe yours fit with mine, valentine You'll never know what I can do Unless you take a step or two If you believe in true romance Then there's a sweepstakes chance That I'm the one for you The only one for you Well maybe that's exactly who I am.
4.
I caught you smiling like a fool Lost in a dream Glowing like candles on a birthday cake Finally eighteen Like I was seven years ago Flirting with sin Little girl dreams they seemed so silly then Now I want in (In)to your understanding simple Sweet and pure and demanding that I Give my heart like a doll to you Hold it tight enough to break it I don't care what they say or do It's enough to know we waited I don't possess a pain that you Couldn't relieve And though I never said the words before Better believe That I need you to give love to Me and I to you, here and now I Give my heart like a doll to you Hold it tight enough to break it I don't care what they say or do It's enough to know we waited I'll never forget what you said that day, "Lovers are all fools anyway", and now I Give my heart like a doll to you And smile to think it true.
5.
Entirely 05:57
If we spent a week alone in Paris Would we fall in love? If we could recite the vows of marriage Would we fall in love? Remember how you started on a painting Of us sitting on the moon? Here from Earth it's hard to see My tiny figure sitting next to you I'm not ready to be a father Yes I know that the baby's yours and mine But I'm not staying one way or other It's your choice entirely If we bought a Christmas tree together Would we fall in love? If we wrote down all we had in common Would we fall in love? If my lips could say the words "I love you" Wouldn't they come true? Then I'd close my eyes and see that I will never fall in love with you I feel like running away is all I can do No matter what happens to you I'll never know But I know it's not fair to you And I never was fair to you We weren't ready to become lovers Thought I saw love beneath a glass of wine But finding love in a son or daughter is Something else entirely.
6.
It's stay-up sleepy time again Am I supposed to trust in you? And as the clock strikes 2 a.m I toss and turn with what to Do or to say when you come home Or if it really matters So what if your hair smells like cologne? We know you've done it all before I saw your careful thoughts collide The day you told me everything Beneath the guilt you wore a pride In what you felt was honesty But you weren't counting the lies Three months of silence had to bring I can forgive Don't look surprised I only ask one little thing Forget his mouth Forget his eyes Forget a thousand little lies Forget you ever had a choice Forget his name Forget his voice I never claimed that I was perfect I suppose it was implied So were you driven to his arms By my imperfect sense of pride? Or perhaps something you read Or the way I made love to you desperately, desolately I guess that you were desperate too I always loved the things in you that I could never be But there must be a side of you I wasn't meant to see Show me Though my heart should be barren Still my love for you grows Like the weeds that destroy the flowers.
7.
Unrehearsed 05:13
Maybe I'm glad to be back on my own After four nights of happiness taken on loan Filled with photos and cars, shameless cliches Lovesongs and daisies and sleeping by day I'll test my heart again in my own time Still I cling to the images fresh in my mind How you painted my heart, colored my day And now I'm left with just sketches in grey Why do you pull your hand away when I reach for you? Seems you can't remember That's not all you let me do Why are you smiling to yourself? Don't pretend you made me fall in love You tell me it isn't fair to pretend, Then you actually say you just want to be friends But you didn't pretend on that first night You couldn't stop shaking and I heard you cry I understand You love love better When it's unrehearsed It gets a little old Can't go on pretending That's why you pull your hand away when I reach for you Seems you can't remember That's not all you let me do Why are you lying to yourself? Don't pretend you made me fall in love Cause it's the truth.
8.
Uncle flew in today Grandma is on her way A stocking stuffed For each of us Dizzy from the falling snow Shying from the mistletoe Gathered around the tree Singing of Christmas dreams That end in rhyme Dreams far from mine It never snows here in L.A. And our family’s not that way Still I hold a hope inside me That brings me here today This is my gift to you Open it Christmas Day Maybe my only chance to say Something I never had the strength to say This is my gift to you Father I have one wish No endless Christmas list No fairy tales No verbal veils To hide behind on Christmas Day Certain words are hard to say Still I have the chance To open my heart another way I can open my heart another way.
9.
Sometimes I seem to fill up my heart With words my lips will not surrender If I should ever seem to forget I want you to know that I remember When you drove me home from work at midnight Kissing me at every stoplight Like when we were new Like true love is true And you touch me softer than sleep I can feel it ringing inside of me And it colors all that I do With a touch of you I used to think that love was a lie But God I wished that there was someone While other stars fell out of the sky You were always there on the horizon When I heard you singing in the shower Butchering the song I wrote you All at once I knew How my wish came true I lay awake sometimes Ready to burst inside Killing the dead of night Hoping to find another strand of hair you left behind and When we shared a pillow on the terrace Counting all the lights in Vegas Time was torn in two Like a deja vu With a touch of you Just a touch of you Not enough of you
10.
As I woke up today I heard the perfect song I tried to write it down but I knew all along There were no real notes or lyrics in my dream Only the echo of a universal theme What does it mean? Somehow I know the perfect song is about love What else is closer to perfection in this life? Not like a Friday party Sunday sing-a-long More like an early bedtime lonesome Tuesday song Just the other day I was addicted to the ordinary Just the other day all my emotion was imaginary Just the other day Then the perfect song washed through me Filled my heart with tragic beauty Now I hear the perfect song in everything Sometimes a hint of music plays inside my head I think I know just what it is but then instead I realize it's not a song I've ever known But it's a perfect start to what will be my own Perfect alone But the perfection loses focus as I write And my most passionate reflections come off trite Even a melody that makes me swoon and sway Lingers a moment then the feeling fades away I love you more than I can ever express In anything but the perfect song That's why it breaks my heart to tell it to you In anything but the perfect song Anything, anything, anything I would do anything For you.

about

My sophomore release, Tuesday Song closes with the song I wrote as a marriage proposal to my wife Michelle. A Different Drum introduced Color Theory to the small but dedicated modern synthpop scene by including “Heart Like a Doll” on its first release, Rise! America’s Synthpop Underground.

credits

released June 1, 1997

Color Theory is Brian Hazard

All songs written, performed, and produced
by Brian Hazard (ASCAP) ©1997 except:

Backing vocals on My Gift to You by The Fountain Valley Troubadours
Bass on Unrehearsed by Todd Sanders
Answering machine on September Spoke in Red courtesy of Ron Shelton

Mastered by Resonance Mastering www.resonancemastering.com

Special thanks the quality control team: Sheri Hogan, Dave Harper, John Kopko, Will Phelps, Mark Nicholas, Michelle Reyes, Lori Hazard, Bill Boocock, Todd Durrant

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Color Theory Huntington Beach, California

Somehow I never outgrew the 80s.

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